There Is No Medium-drive, Goldilocks: You May Quote Me, Miley! LFMAO


I had quite the afternoon jolt this afternoon as I perused my very backyard, the weed-strewn Internet. Jon was napping after an early and hectic Wednesday morning dealing with electricians. Man of opportunity that I am, the two hours were spent downstairs with Leopold II, my iPad.

Working on an involved prosaic piece unrelated to this humble post, I started searching for quotes and double-checking my use of foreign texts. As I kept looking out the window to survey the magnificent rain, I glanced down in horror and mumbled loudly. Jon would’ve heard and begrudgingly awakened had it not been for his deep and unshakeable slumber.

A new generation of people is already impacting our literary and grammar culture’s changing voices. We all know the web-derived and often sang-based lexicon of this current millennium: tweet, cougar, selfie, bromance mp3, cloud, blue tooth, tweak, grill, cunnilinge, smart phone, texting, and sexting.

Im some cases, a word may just be used as a different part of speech, my least favorite being, for example: “To message or de-friend one’s friends while orientating them on how to cunnilingue or while tweeting or skyping” would surely offend Miss Manners and several generations of Vanderbilts and stodgy grammarians.

Admittedly, my fun-loving, CD playing, and insurance-challenged Baby Boomer buddies are not innocent of such a slip or mix a word. They freshened the vocabulary with approachable new jargon: yuppy, cell-phone, email, hard-drive, soft-drive, Reaganomics, sound-bite, microwave, and Dixiecrat.

Neither reserved wordmongers nor cautious futurists, our parents’ peers combined the hipster musings of a counter-culture beatnik with the grooviness of flower-children. And thus, hippies, as a concept, were reluctantly, born. Physicians and researchers also coined the myriad medical terms that help define a field’s advancement and render thesauri obsolete.

Who speaketh of adjectives and nouns and verbs upside-down (and I was!),  let he confess now and reserve his judgment. Mind you, that last “J” word will never accept that blasted “e” that folks try to force upon it.  But I digress and ramble as I after do in the wee-est of morning hours.

I decided to remain mission-driven and medal-worthy, spending my final internet time continuing my quest for a quotation. Perhaps, a clever literary passage or excerpt from a pertinent political speech would perfectly fit the bill.

Optimistically, I two-stepped right over to Quotations and googled several search words and was aghast at what I discovered quotations by the likes of Miley Cyrus, Taylor Swift, Lady GaGa, R. Kelly, and an Olsen twin. I forget which one. I tried “BrainyQuote”, “Think Exist”, “Good Reads”, and “Think Exist”.  I won’t promise you a “Quote Garden!” Grumbling, mumbling, and altogether fumbling, even I dusted off those heavy, unwieldy tomes by the Messieurs Roget and Webster.

My last option succeeded just from its simplicity … as well as some innate resistance that I might have for the language that we all speak.

In both fabulosity and “gammarosity”, I bid thee a satisfying slumber, Gentle Reader.

P.S. Apple’s Siri never had either Mrs Stella Whitlock or Ms Sue Medley for school teachers!

(Jean Cocteau directed the French adaptation of “A Streetcar Named Desire” in 1949, casting legendary French actress and singer, the legendary Arletty, and, originally, his occasional boyfriend and once soulmate, Jean Marais. Cocteau ultimately had to replace Marais in Williams classic, casting Yves Vincent. Cocteau obviously designed the programs, posters, and stage sets.)

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